-- a beginning you refused to be included in, but are now begging to be in.
You practically pushed me out the door the moment my commitment showed a slight weakness. Actually let me rephrase that- you did not push me out door, but instead cornered me to the point where depression was in the horizon. The point where the only thing I could do was sabotage and pretend I had slipped by accident. You did not even have the courage to admit you had given up. As you begged for my attention, you admitted to your selfish abandonment, which proved that I was no delusional fool. I had sensed it all along, but I chose to ignore it, putting all my trust and hope in you. Instead, you left mere bird droppings of appropriate break ups before your new beginning. Now it's my turn, and rather than silly little hints, I'm dropping a nuclear bomb on you. Let's take a road trip though memory lane and reminisce at the constant mindless fights. The times I cried in front of you, a clear sign of defeat, and the times you chose to fight fire with fire. Too bad I found myself a fireman. I am not ashamed to admit almost all of those were my fault. But you shoved it to my face and condemned me guilty for eternity. Never will I forget the times you blamed me for your psychological problems. Now that I think of it.. You remind me of poor Oedipus.
Meet the old me:
I'm stubborn.
I get irrational and fight over little things
especially when things don't go my way.
I am a brat.
Nice to finally meet you.
I found someone that called me out on the above, and is a complete opposite of me in that way. And you believe to be better? As much as you claim you have changed- you will never be my superman, only a dude, that I once thought was "totally awesome".
Clearly, you have forgotten that as one door closes, three others open. Yet I remember constantly knocking at yours, hoping you'd realize it was a mistake. Funny the shoes have been switched. I tried out the first two doors and found myself feeling like dirt, not knowing a golden treasure hid behind the third. You are mistaken if you think I had forgotten everything. I remember the good, the bad and the ugly, and dude- I would not trade what I have now for what you claim to promise, a second time around.
It's funny how you now have to resort to referring to sappy movies to defend your point of view. Looks like those nights smoking up with your newly found best buds instead of talking to your cutie, pushed Freud out and pulled Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling in. Here's a newsflash: The Notebook was a movie slash fiction slash not you and me. It seems you and I are at the same level you would be ashamed to admit you are in. It's saddening that you have to refer to my writing errors as "freudian mistakes" which would mean that I secretly still love you.. right? But you are wrong, my dearest dude. Now I'm in the middle of giving someone worthy of a chance.. a chance, and you claim you are better. What have you been taught at that prestigious household of yours? I believe great bonds between different people should not be compared. Please notice the lack of a writing error.
We'll soon be putting on for the same city, and according to you we're suddenly perfect for each other again? I and my current will have to go through the same test, and distance but unlike our failed attempt, we will pass with flying colours.
Memory Lane is closed, now go free your mind, you lonely stoner.
PS. I tried, but I don't want you the way you want me to want you.
You practically pushed me out the door the moment my commitment showed a slight weakness. Actually let me rephrase that- you did not push me out door, but instead cornered me to the point where depression was in the horizon. The point where the only thing I could do was sabotage and pretend I had slipped by accident. You did not even have the courage to admit you had given up. As you begged for my attention, you admitted to your selfish abandonment, which proved that I was no delusional fool. I had sensed it all along, but I chose to ignore it, putting all my trust and hope in you. Instead, you left mere bird droppings of appropriate break ups before your new beginning. Now it's my turn, and rather than silly little hints, I'm dropping a nuclear bomb on you. Let's take a road trip though memory lane and reminisce at the constant mindless fights. The times I cried in front of you, a clear sign of defeat, and the times you chose to fight fire with fire. Too bad I found myself a fireman. I am not ashamed to admit almost all of those were my fault. But you shoved it to my face and condemned me guilty for eternity. Never will I forget the times you blamed me for your psychological problems. Now that I think of it.. You remind me of poor Oedipus.
Meet the old me:
I'm stubborn.
I get irrational and fight over little things
especially when things don't go my way.
I am a brat.
Nice to finally meet you.
I found someone that called me out on the above, and is a complete opposite of me in that way. And you believe to be better? As much as you claim you have changed- you will never be my superman, only a dude, that I once thought was "totally awesome".
Clearly, you have forgotten that as one door closes, three others open. Yet I remember constantly knocking at yours, hoping you'd realize it was a mistake. Funny the shoes have been switched. I tried out the first two doors and found myself feeling like dirt, not knowing a golden treasure hid behind the third. You are mistaken if you think I had forgotten everything. I remember the good, the bad and the ugly, and dude- I would not trade what I have now for what you claim to promise, a second time around.
It's funny how you now have to resort to referring to sappy movies to defend your point of view. Looks like those nights smoking up with your newly found best buds instead of talking to your cutie, pushed Freud out and pulled Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling in. Here's a newsflash: The Notebook was a movie slash fiction slash not you and me. It seems you and I are at the same level you would be ashamed to admit you are in. It's saddening that you have to refer to my writing errors as "freudian mistakes" which would mean that I secretly still love you.. right? But you are wrong, my dearest dude. Now I'm in the middle of giving someone worthy of a chance.. a chance, and you claim you are better. What have you been taught at that prestigious household of yours? I believe great bonds between different people should not be compared. Please notice the lack of a writing error.
We'll soon be putting on for the same city, and according to you we're suddenly perfect for each other again? I and my current will have to go through the same test, and distance but unlike our failed attempt, we will pass with flying colours.
Memory Lane is closed, now go free your mind, you lonely stoner.
PS. I tried, but I don't want you the way you want me to want you.
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